Girls are easier than boys. That is what they say.
What do I mean by that?
When I was pregnant with Jessica, everyone told me that girls are easier than boys. They are calmer and more laid back than boys. And to be honest, she has been easier, I even find myself reciting the same sentence to my friends that are now pregnant. Girls are easier than boys!
But are they?
I said this very thing to Sam and he said are they?
Yes, 100% I said.
But then I got thinking, are girls easier than boys?
When I think about who has said that girls are easier than boys, it has been either been people who only have girls. How would they know? They haven’t had a boy, how do they know that boys are easier? They don’t.
Or parents like me, have one of each.
Surely we know. Girls are definitely easier than boys.
Well, looking at it, I have a boy and then my girl came second. This is also the case for other parents I know who say girls are easier than boys.
If I compare Reuben and Jessica’s behaviours on a few things that stand out;
- Reuben woke needed feeding every two hours, day or night.
Jessica went every three to four hours.
- Reuben didn’t sleep through until he was eight months old.
Jessica slept through from three months.
- Reuben is full of energy and has been on the go, even as a baby.
Jessica is regularly described as “laid back”
Just by these three points, it would look that girls really are easier than boys.
But are they?
- Reuben woke every two hours because he was hungry, he needed to be fed. Nothing to do with his sex.
Jessica would cluster feed and then go longer through the night.
- Reuben didn’t sleep through the night until he was eight months old. Why? Because I would rock him to sleep every night. So every time he woke he needed to be rocked back to sleep. Have I repeated this with Jessica? No. I have helped her to sleep by herself. She doesn’t rely on being rocked.
- Jessica is described as laid back. Why? Well it is likely that this is because she has not had our undivided attention. When she cries we have not been able to run to her immediately as we may be doing something with Reuben. She has had to learn to wait a little while. Now don’t get me wrong she is not left to cry for ages but certainly longer than Reuben was ever left.
Also, I am more relaxed as a mother; has this had a knock on effect? Probably (definitely)
So Is It That Girls Are Easier Than Boys?
I don’t think so.
The parents that I know that have this view have all had their girls after their boys.
So in reality, is it that girls are easier than boys or is it that you’re a different parent the second, third, fourth time round?
I think that it is likely the latter. You have changed. Your parenting style has changed. You are no longer a first time parent figuring things out, OK, you’re still figuring things out just not everything.
You know what worked and what didn’t with your first and you’ve adjusted.
After all that’s what parenting is, is it not? You learn and adjust.
What are your thoughts?
Were your girls easier than boys? Or have your boys been easier?